Becoming the Fairytale pt. 1

When I was very young, I made a plan. A plan that was largely influenced by growing up in the South and by my obsession with Cinderella. Like most little girls, I dreamed of one day meeting "the one," my Prince Charming, having an enormous wedding, and settling down into our own cozy little happily-ever-after. All of this after graduating college with a master's degree, of course. In fact, I figured, I would most likely meet this lucky fellow while in school. Obviously, it would be love at first sight and we would spend our time having intellectual discussions over coffee, browsing used bookstores, and touring the country with our guitars in our VW bus (naturally, we would be rock stars, too).
Life would be peaches and cream. Sunshine and rainbows. Unicorns and...you get the picture.
But, as you've probably already learned, life rarely goes how we envision it. And it certainly never ends up like in the movies (especially not like the Disney princess movies).
A bachelor's degree and the worst relationship of my life later, I found myself back in my hometown, living with my parents again, and taking a minimum wage job at a home improvement store. It was during this time that I celebrated my 25th birthday and was accosted with this statement by a heartless bitch- I mean a good intentioned- coworker,

"You're how old now?? 25? You know, when I was your age, I was married and expecting my third child. You don't even have a man right now, do you?"

No, no I don't. Nor any prospects. And I sell paint and nails for a living. You're right...I think I'll go adopt five dozen cats now...
I wish that I could tell you that after that day my life magically got better and that I met "the one" and finally started my future. I also wish that I could tell you that I punched her in her stupid face. But none of that would be true.
The reality is that I continued to work there for another year and then went on to other low-paying, shit-slinging kinds of jobs, that I continued to seek out and date more scum of the earth, that I continued to spiral further into a deep despair, and that I worried constantly that my life, my future, would never begin. Also during this time, I adopted a cat.
The only thing standing in the way of my future as a cranky old hermit was a dozen or more friends and relatives.
Despite my ill fortune in the love department, I am extremely fortunate to have an abundance of close girlfriends and family members who aren't afraid of my meltdowns and mellow-dramatics. 
It was through their wisdom, fearlessness, and sheer stubbornness that I gleaned a new perspective on my life and future.
This is what I learned:

1. Life has already begun. If you're waiting around for "Mr. Right" so that you can "start" your life, then you're actually wasting your life. All that time and energy that you spend dreaming of your wedding, planning what you want to accomplish together when you finally meet him, is all time you could be spending actually accomplishing something. On your own.
2. If you aren't happy being alone, then you won't be happy with him. And you definitely won't make him happy either. Why would anyone worth having want to be with you if you can't even make yourself happy? Get a hobby. Do something you enjoy. Have goals and ambitions and dreams (other than your Cinderella fairytale). Be adventurous. Find what makes you happy.
3. Surround yourself with positive people. Unless you truly desire to be a crazy old maid cat lady, fill your life with good friends who aren't afraid to call you out when you're being dumb and encourage you when you think your life is over and no one will ever love you because you're a psychotic OCD freak with a cat named Bo Diddly and a secret guilty pleasure of watching marathons of Gossip Girl...
4. Forgive yourself for the mistakes you've made in the past and move forward. We've all been there. We've all done things we regretted (even those stuffy do-gooders whose motto in life is "Live with no regrets") It's inevitable. Nobody is perfect. So cut yourself some slack, pick yourself up, learn your lesson, and move on to something better.
5. Don't ever let anyone convince you that you are anything less than awesome. You deserve to be happy, respected, loved, adored, and told that you are incredible every single day. Because you are.
After all, you are a forever girl. And it doesn't get much better than that.

Best,

The Forever Girl